Tuesday, January 19, 2010

J FOR...

well, everybody seems to be kinda in love right now..!! what month is it? its not Valentine's yet!!
its kinda hard for me try to accept that my friends are starting to be very busy on work, studies, and especially, LOVE
what?? me?? jelous?? phhsshhh~~ hah, phssshhh..naahhh....
oh, okay, alright, a little!!
just maybe a what...
cuz, maybe i used to had fun in my old days...(rasa cam tua btol plak)..
had fun when there's people who there to love you...
who needs you, and say sweet things about you.,.
i remember to feel that, i remember that moment where i used to had that memories.,
but it all starting to fade as i grew up. everything started to be something i called "real life"..i wont step into that fantasies again and lately? love isn't something that I'm good at. these few years have been the most-bad-luck-on-love for me..(award winner that shoulnd't get any claps..=_=") no longer "everyone's most fav girl" no more.. i wonder why, then i figured out the answers myself. it is something to do with my surrounding, my thoughts, and myself. Im being too obsessed to be with someone, then i forget how to live my life. year by year, with all that heart-break stories (which i think i shud write a book for them) that i had created, im starting to fall to pieces.well, its kinda normal when we felt like we need someone to be there for you instead of just ur friend. i mean sumone speacial lahh...i kinda feel that way too..i keep searching sum1 to seal back my broken hearted. but then everytime i find sum1 i like, things getting to get worse, heart got broken even worse, and worse!!
i've been doing a lot of thinking...and then, im thinkin that im starting to get used to single life....its fun!!i can assure you that!! and if suddenly sum1...maybe sum1 laa, wanna have relationship with me, i think maybe i'll have to reject that, cuz frankly? i had really special person in my heart....;). and he's the only one who owns my heart and of course my thoughts right now, i guess its single but not available!! ^^


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