when your days get rough, do you ever feel like you would rather sleep forever and never wake up?. well, at least lebih baik dari bunuh diri. ( x sakit...) u know what? thats what i feel right now..
when i came to think, even if i trust someone and i tell him/her about my thoughts somehow, i bet they wouldn't understand...
life become so hard for me this lately,..sometimes i got distracted with other easier things, but then it came back, making me miserable again and again.
some bad situation, i can motivate on my own but for this, i can't do this alone.
i need answers for every questions i had..... i need reasons, for every step i had to take...i need clue for every problems that i had to face..and i need shoulder to cry on for every heartbreak-moments that i experience.
yea, did i tell you i cried a lot these days?. i did..kadang2 org xnampak, cuz im crying inside., susa, tau tak...but most of the time i cried when no one's around. my future,present and past makes me burst into tears..sometimes bcus of my family or frens. suddenly jadik budak pendiam,. i dont talk much like before. even, yesterday when im having reunion with my frens, i just keep my mouth shut, (except with ajer. i like talking with him ). but i laugh a lot...just laugh...i dont know why..maybe my problems avoid me from making another worst chapter of my life..i guess,.laugh is a good remedy, some says,..but it does not work for me right now. i laugh too for good jokes! but then...you know...too much, jadi x eklas...confuse la sangat2 skrg ne. i cant find light in this dark roads...im afraid, i would fall and gone forever..huhu. God, please, help me...i really need You. im begging!
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